To sleep: perchance to dream

I have this little condition whereby when I am stressed or nervous, I can't sleep. Like, at all. Needless to say, I have been a little stressed lately.

Tuesday night, despite having enough booze in me to put down a rhino (don't do that, they are endangered), I managed exactly zero hours of sleep. Nada. None. In fact, when I went to bed, I knew it wasn't going to happen, so I didn't even bother to set my alarm.

Last night, I didn't see it happening, either, so I sat down and started watching some old Bette Davis movies around 11 or so. I watched "All About Eve." And "The Virgin Queen." And "Phone Call from a Stranger." And I started watching "Hush... Hush, Sweet Charlotte," but lo and behold, around 5:15 a.m. I nodded off for a bit. Don't worry, though, I was back awake at 7:34. At least, that's what my phone said.

It's quite possibly my least favorite thing about myself, my inability to completely clear my mind and just relax. I normally have about 18,000 things going through my head at any given minute. The Wellbutrin has brought that down significantly, but there still are dozens of thoughts going on at once.

And right now, not all of them are positive.

Anyhow, I'd like to take a nap right now, but I know it's not possible. I'll sit here and try to relax and clear my head as much as I can. But since I doubt that works, either, maybe I'll just go see if I can find some sleep in a pitcher or three of beer.