When you have nothing else...

...you're left with faith. For me, having faith is a tough pill to swallow. Mostly, I think, because I believe that faith in anything starts with having faith in yourself. At least, I always have thought that.

But maybe it doesn't. Maybe it's exactly the opposite. Maybe you need to be willing to have faith to finally start having faith in yourself. Who knows.

I am finally starting to have some faith. Not in God or any of that (Sorry, I am not trying to write anything at all metaphysical here!). I am talking in people.

I have faith in the handful of people who always have stood by me no matter what.

I have faith that all the unpleasantness in a few relationships that I am dealing with will resolve themselves.

I have faith that all the sacrifices I have made and that I have asked my kids to make will work out for the best.

I have faith that by letting go and only focusing on what I can do for me I will begin to find some release.

I have faith...

Ok, so maybe not entirely. That's one of the beautiful parts of faith, though... It doesn't ever start out perfect and unwavering. It must be built. And maybe my allowing myself to start this foundation of faith, I can build a tower of faith in myself.

And if not, I am going to borrow a phrase that I heard from an AA sponsor... "If you don't have faith, fake it 'til you make it."